Mario: Pictures of his friends

Dr. Mario: Mario’s side blog where he reblogs health and safety textposts

Luigi: Reblogs from Mario, long-winded passive-aggresive text posts, constantly reminds people to tag their ghosts

Peach: Pictures of food and cute things

Bowser: ALLCAPS SHITPOSTING, always reblogs Jr. and the Koopalings

Bowser Jr/Koopalings: Shitposting, memes, reblogs from Bowser

Rosalina: Photos of space, cute stuff for kids

Yoshi: Pictures of food, arts and crafts

Wario: Pure, unfiltered, nonstop shitposting, a ridiculous amount of Vines

Donkey Kong: Text posts that are only one or two words long, blog autoplays the DK Rap

Diddy Kong: Reblogs from all of the other Kongs, mostly from Funky

Mr. Game And Watch: Extremely old-school aesthetic, two-frame animations

Little Mac: Doc Louis reblogs, selfies showing off his guns, sponsored posts he contractually has to make

Link: Reblogs scenery and pictures of enemies, sometimes in black-and-white

Zelda: Very polite political blog

Sheik: Zelda’s side blog, reblogs resources for transgender people

Ganondorf: Made an account seven years ago, got banned for sending threatening messages

Toon Link: Photography blog: 95% selfies, 5% scenery

Samus: Scenery from alien planets, text posts about saving endangered species, pictures of cute animals

Zero Suit Samus: Samus’s rarely-updated side blog for selfies

Pit: Bad puns, aerial photography, hot springs

Dark Pit: Has Pit blocked, but his blog content is almost exactly identical

Palutena: Puns, memes

Marth: Political blog, entirely in Japanese

Roy: Pictures of swords, occasional clueless text posts (in Japanese)

Ike: Blogs for his friends

Robin: Shipping trash, stays up until 4 AM crying about their OTPs

Lucina: Marth RP blog

Duck Hunt: Pictures of cute animals, gifs of people getting hurt

Kirby: Pictures of food, sloppy but enthusiastic drawings

King Dedede: Selfie hell, sloppy text posts about himself

Meta Knight: Motivational gifsets

Fox: Desperately trying to clean up after Falco

Falco: Makes snarky responses on other people’s text posts and starts fights

Pikachu: Pictures of other Pikachu

Charizard: Reblogs dragon-related posts and tags them with sad emojis

Lucario: Weird spiritual blog that nobody understands

Jigglypuff: Posts their own enthusiastic covers of popular music and their own unapoligetically shitty drawings

Greninja: Anime trash

Mewtwo: Long and well-researched text posts about preventing animal cruelty

R.O.B.: All posts are tagged as ‘seizure warning’

Ness: 90′s aesthetic and music

Lucas: Cute pictures, sad text posts hidden under Read Mores

Captain Falcon: Pictures of cars, reblogs from official F-Zero accounts, sponsored posts he contractually has to make  

Villager: A chaotic mix of pleasant gardening posts and shitposts, posts every single day without fail

Olimar/Alph: Extremely relaxing nature blog

Wii Fit Trainer: Fitness blog

Shulk: Reblogs from nerdy engineering blogs and all of his friends, always adds something unnecessary like “Yeah, that’s awesome!” whenever he reblogs something

Sonic: Basically the official Sonic Twitter, a perfect mix of memery and self-awareness

Pac-Man: 80′s aesthetic and food

Mega Man: Reblogs every single post that Dr. Light makes and nothing else

Ryu: Unironically makes and posts genuine motivational posters