this isnt some Feminist Joke, btw, they basically teach this in food safety since so many guys think its fine to not wash their hands after they’ve touched their dick

THIS IS TRUE AND I HATE TOUCHING ANYTHING AT WORK

I have to share this now.

I work at a tech company. One project had me interacting with a software engineer that kept installing new versions of the project over his previous work, causing us all sorts of headaches. I told him this was the software equivalent of cooking a meal after using the toilet, and he was making us all sick.

Fast forward a bit. I’m coming in to work and pass this individual on the way in to the gowning area/locker room/restroom (we have showers and changing rooms at work). He enters the bathroom area, washes his hands, THEN uses the toilet, and then LEAVES.

I can do nothing but stare disbelieving at his back. What is going on? Does he think the order of the steps isn’t important, as long as he does them? Is he doing this to spite me because of what I said?

The answer is none of the above.

Dudes just be like that.

One of the first pieces of advice my doctor told me after I became immune compromised was to avoid shaking people’s hands but especially the hands of men. The second piece of advice was to go plastic and avoid handling cash ever, but especially cash back from clerks who were men (so if the clerk was a woman and I had cash I needed to offload go ahead and play roulette but credit/debit only if the clerk was a dude).

Then they showed me a study about the restroom habits of men complete with bacterial/viral/fungal cultures taken from hands of men who did wash, who didn’t wash, and who claimed to wash but hadn’t actually. It was real gross, y'all. There was a similar study for women but even the women who didn’t wash their hands had less contagion because they were not directly in contact with their genitals.

So like, big pass from me on hand shakes in general.

A thing a group of guys have said openly to me: “Urine is sterile - I don’t get what the fuss is all about!”

Yes, numb-nuts, urine is sterile, but your dick is not! Your dick is in your pants with your arse and your fecal matter and your bum sweat nicely incubating bacteria and potentially the eggs of worms you might be carrying that are just waiting to get on your hands and go in your mouth and hatch in your intestines - THAT IS THEIR LIFECYCLE.

I think in general we do a bad job of explaining to children about why we have to wash our hands. Girls just get corrected on it more often.

It’s then fed into by the same attitude that leads to mansplaining - men are encouraged to take a little bit of knowledge, extrapolate from it, and decide they are experts. Hence, boasting about not washing your hands because you have the SCIENCE to know that urine is sterile.

WASH YOUR FUCKING HANDS - YOU HAVEN’T FOUND A LOOP HOLE, YOU’RE SPREADING DISEASE AND PARASITES!